Bob and Lorraine's Krishmush Kookys

Yesterday was, as I suspected, low key. There were however a few surprises, Colleen and Mark arrived at the house at 2:02, and the Carters and Calonico's came over for dessert and after dinner drinks. We polished off four bottles of wine, one Kahlua, one Baileys, some Crown Royal, Old Bushmill (Irish Coffee), vodka and Dewar's. Now thats getting into the holiday spirit(s). Our guests didn't stay long as they waking up at thee in the morning to take advantage of the "Black Friday" sales. Jill said she could save $100 on a DVD player, WOW. I told Jill I would give her the $100 so she could sleep like a normal person.
It's now on to Christmas. A very good friend of ours, Lorraine Cole, was kind enough to share a old family recipe with us. The Cole's are great people and when they aren't upsetting their neighbors, they are a lot of fun. Maybe in 2009 they can visit us. Thanks again for the secret recipe.

Christmas Cookies

1 cup of water
1 tsp baking soda
1 cup of sugar
1 tsp salt
1 cup of brown sugar
Lemon juice
4 large eggs
1 cup nuts
2 cups of dried fruit
1 bottle Jose Cuervo Tequila

Sample the Cuervo to check quality. Take a large bowl, check the Cuervo again to be sure it is of the highest quality, pour one level cup and drink. Turn on the electric mix er. Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl. Add one teaspoon of sugar. Beat again. At this point it's best to make sure the Cuervo is still OK, try another cup just in case.

Turn off the mixer thingy. Break 2 leggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit, Pick the frigging fruit off floor. Mix on the turner. If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers just! pry it loose with a drewscriver. Sample the Cuervo to check for tonsisticity. Next, sift two cups of salt, or something. Check the Jose Cuervo.

Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one table. Add a spoon of sugar, or somefink. Whatever you can find. Greash the oven. Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over. Don't forget to beat off the turner. Finally, throw the bowl through the window, finish the Cose Juervo and make sure to put the stove in the dishwasher