Happy Birthday Meaghan

As it has now become a tradition, please view the video of the our birthday girl Meaghan.

Or if you would like to view it a full screen mode click on this Meaghan

Nothing Going On So Some Odds and Ends

Ho Hum, things have been quiet, real quiet. Perhaps it is the lull before the storm? Let's see, "The Madge" had to bring her car in to the dealer as the "check engine" light came on. This happened because the car was approaching 5,000 miles and it is the manufacturers way of scaring you into bringing it in to the dealer. Read the owners manual, "If the Check Engine light comes on, shut the car off and immediately bring it to your dealer". As soon as we told the service department what the mileage is they just said to drive it in for it's 5,000 mile check up. The reason I am mentioning this is the car is 2 1/2 years old, she averages about 155 miles per month, or 5 miles per day. When her car was about two months old she had to call roadside assistance because her battery was dead. When the man came to the house to charge the battery he noticed the car had 14 miles on it, that's right FOURTEEN. "The Madge" is considering getting a new car, Hello !!!, she has one in her garage.
Colleen and Mark are off skiing in Tahoe and sent this photo of the view from their condo. They are trying snowboarding for the first time, so take a lot of pictures now before the camera breaks from a fall. In about one week Caden will be driving down from Frisco with his Mom, Dad and dog to spend a Easter week with the Grandparents and Uncle Cooper. He is currently enrolled in a three month course at Emler Swim School, but not to learn how to how to perfect the butterfly stroke but to teach him to hold his breath while under water and how to float on his back without flailing about. Good for him, I'm glad he talked his parents into this. Here are the latest pictures (taken yesterday) of the little Aqua Tot.

She and the Doctor should be shot

Tabhair 'om póg, is Éireannach mé

Beannachtaí na Féile Páraic oraibh! An bhfuil tú dálta fós? A Happy St. Paddy's day to ya. Tis' March the 17th. The wearing of the green. My day starts out normal until about 10 A.M. when "The Madge" begins to remind me that I am a Mutt and not as Irish as she is. What a day at our house, with the sounds of Irish music playing in the background and the smell of corned beef and cabbage drifting through the house. I am sure she will watch "The Quiet Man" at least twice. All day long she will tell at least two dozen people that SHE IS IRISH, 100% pure, and that I am a Mongrel, a blend of German, French, Irish and god forbid English. She will also point out that our children, Colleen, Erin, Meaghan and Allison Shannon are more Irish than me, I am amazed that she could do the math. Today everyone is Irish, even the Mexican gardener is wearing green. "Hola Ricardo. Día de Patricks santo feliz." As far as I am concerned Irish Coffee should start being consumed around noon and hmmmm, I think I will wear my Orange "longhorn" shirt, that should get a raise out of her.
Slán agus beannacht leat 's Póg mo thóin!

A Few Laughs To Brighten You Day

On their way to get married, a young catholic couple is involved in a fatal car accident, The couple find themselves sitting outside the Pearly Gates waiting for St. Peter to process them into Heaven. While waiting, they to wonder. Could they possibly get married in Heaven? When St. Peter arrived the asked him.
St. Peter say, "I don't know. This is the first time anyone has asked. Let me go find out," and he leaves.
The couple sat and waited, and waited. Two months passed and the couple is still waiting. As they waited they discussed that if they were allowed to get married, what was the eternal aspect of it all. What if it doesn't work? they wondered, "Are we stuck together forever?
After yet another month, St' Peter finally returns, looking somewhat bedraggled. "Yes," he informs the couple, "you can get married in Heaven/
"Great" said the couple. "But we were wondering, what if things don't work out? Could we also get a divorce in Heaven?"
St. Peter, red-faced with anger, slams his clipboard onto the ground/
"What's wrong?" asked the frightened couple.
"Oh, come on". St. Peter shouts, "it took me three months to find a priest up here, do you have any idea how long it will take me to find a lawyer?"

+++++

Murphy told Quinn that his wife was driving him to drink. Quinn thinks he's very lucky because his own wife makes him walk.

++++++

An American lawyer asked, 'Paddy, why is it that whenever you ask an Irishman a question, he answers with another question?'
'Who told you that?' asked Paddy.

++++++

Reilly went to trial for armed robbery. The jury foreman came out and announced, 'Not guilty.'
'That's grand!' shouted Reilly. 'Does that mean I can keep the money?'

+++++++

Slaney phoned the maternity ward at the hospital.. 'Quick!', he said.
'Send an ambulance, my wife is goin' to have a baby!'
'Tell me, is this her first baby?' the intern asked.
'No, this is her husband, Kevin, speakin'.'

+++++++

Brenda O'Malley is home making dinner, as usual, when Tim Finnegan
arrives at her door. 'Brenda, may I come in?' he asks. 'I've somethin'
to tell ya'.
'Of course you can come in, you're always welcome, Tim.. But where's
my husband?'
'That's what I'm here to be telling ya, Brenda. There was an accident
down at the Guinness brewery'
'Oh, God no!' cries Brenda. 'Please don't tell me.'
'I must, Brenda. Your husband Shamus is dead and gone. I'm sorry.
Finally, she looked up at Tim. 'How did it happen, Tim?'
'It was terrible, Brenda.. He fell into a vat of Guinness Stout, and drowned.'
'Oh my dear! But you must tell me true, Tim, did he at least go quickly?'
'Well, Brenda, no. In fact, he got out three times to pee.'

+++++++

A drunk staggers into a Catholic Church, enters a confessional booth, sits down, but says nothing.
The Priest coughs a few times to get his attention, but the drunk continues to sit there.
Finally, the Priest pounds three times on the wall.
The drunk mumbles, 'Ain't no use knockin, there's no paper on this side either.'

A thank you to Lorraine, Tony, Jim and Patrick

Here We Go Again

For some strange reason I thought that income tax time was only about two weeks ago, oh well it's time to get organized, submit the papers and wait for the accountant to give me the bad news. I, for some reason, always thought that when you stopped working you wouldn't have to worry about taxes. Hello, wake up.
The other day, my daughter Erin asked me if I knew the Old Mother Hubbard nursery rhyme. You know the one that goes; "Old Mother Hubbard went to the cupboard to fetch her poor dog a bone. But when she got there, the cupboard was bare and so the poor dog had none." That's the only part I knew and didn't realize that this rhyme goes on and on. Further into this little children's nursery rhyme the dog dies then they have him laughing, dancing, smoking etc etc. Don't believe me? Click on Old Mother Hubbard . I wonder if the Three Blind Mice had automated lamellar keratoplasty regained their eyesight, and had all their little friends thinking they were still blind, got government disability pay and laughed all the way to the bank.
I finally got some recent pictures of Buddy aka Sean, thank you Meaghan for finding the camera. That was a shot.
A friend of mine, Mike Jordan, sent this video. No, this is not The Michael Jordan, this guy is white and probably made about 100 million dollars less.

An Audio Stroll

After looking at a website that was dedicated to my 45th high school reunion I decided to give you an audio stroll back to the 50's and 60's so sit back and enjoy.

Snopes

OK Snopes says the story about AIG is false, now I am wondering whether one can "snopes" snopes??

Some Tidbits

It's Texas Independence day so take a look at the video I've posted. I received the following email from Jim Garrity. I haven't checked it out yet.

"Don't Worry Be Happy!!

Remember when this economic crisis hit and Congress let Bear Sterns go under, pushed a forced marriages between banks, etc., etc.?
Then they bailed out AIG. At the time, I thought "That's strange what does an insurance company have to do with this crisis??" I think I just found the answer. Among other things, AIG INSURES THE PENSION TRUST OF THE UNITED STATES CONGRESS!!!!! No wonder they got bailed out right away!! To hell with the people, let's protect our future, said all our Senators and Congressmen. Nice to see where their loyalities lie!! (I'm from the government and I'm here to help you!)
Well on to the grandkids, Caden is now a full time crawler with walking right around the corner. These pictures were taken yesterday .
The cruise was exactly one month ago and finally Kay Kennedy dropped off the pictures she took. Since she is still using a Kodak Brownie it took a few weeks to find a place that knows how to develop the film. Get with the times Kate!!! After looking at the shots only one deserves to be on this blog. Here's Big Joe wearing nothing but a bandaid and watch eating his chocolate covered strawberries.

Happy Independence Day

Uh Oh, It Wont Be Long Now

Did I report the other day that things are back to normal after the operation??? Normal was not the correct assessment of what is going on. Think of drinking lighter fluid or perhaps Bhut Jolokia (a pepper that makes the jalepeno look like a sissy) juice then relieving yourself. OUCH. Nothing like a little liquid fire in the middle of the night and then trying to go back to sleep, thank God for "Movies on Demand". By the way, my Doc prescribed a medication called Cialis to promote regeneration of damaged nerves and blood flow. Our local drug store called yesterday to advise me that they could NOT fill this prescription until the doctor fills out another form and they get authorization from my medical insurance company. "Is there a problem with this drug?" I asked. "No Sir" the druggist replied "but normally this pill is taken five to six times a month and not daily as in your case". Boy what an opportunity. "Will this take long? Uh, OK I can wait till then but it sure puts a damper on this weekend". Wonder what kind of looks "The Madge" will get when she picks this prescription up.
Erin went into Cadens room the other day and look what she found.
We have to think that another few months and he might be climbing out of the crib, roaming around the house at three in the morning, readjusting the various settings on the stereo and/or TV and perhaps make an overseas call or two on the phone. The whole time he is snooping around a big smile will be on his face. Perhaps I am giving him too much credit on making the phone calls since the phone is out of his reach, but a quick push of the chair and look, it is within his grasp. Hello China.

Only in Texas

Back to Normal

Went to the Doctor yesterday to have the last tube removed from my body. Dr. Chip Winkle of the "If you can't tinkle see Winkle" fame is quite a interesting character, he has an earring, rides a Harley and has won numerous awards in the area including but not limited to "most humorous" and "most congenial". He informed me that he is about two operations away from being certified on the Da Vinci robot, Huh??? Don't worry he said he was assisting another doctor who is certified. Well on with a normal life until "The Madge" has me see another specialist.
Bob Stefans of Sugarland sent an interesting story about a man that was pulled over for having a bumper sticker that read "Abort Obama not the Unborn". Well rather than write about it OKC man pulled over
Gotta go now there is somebody is knocking or kicking my front door.

Chew On This

Without getting too graphic the eating instructions you received after having your prostate removed is "After surgery until you expel the air that has been pumped into you eat one teaspoon of ice chips at a time, once you have passed the air you graduate to colored liquids". Breaking wind is no problem for a pro like me so I went into colored liquids within 24 hours, now comes the tricky part. "Continue of colored liquids until you have a movement at which point you can eat solid foods" OK, I have been eating jello and slurping down broth and juices for almost one week, remember you must fast 24 hours prior to surgery. What would they like me to move??? There is nothing in the system!!! I broke down today and asked "The Madge" to give me something to EAT, well I just had a can of Tuna fish and it tasted better than any meal I have ever eaten in my entire life. It took twenty minutes to finish it, savoring each bite and I am full. I don't want to get carried away so for dinner I might have two cups of warm water and an cherry flavored ice pop.
In the meantime I would like to share these with you.

Some of the artists of the 60's are revising their hits with new lyrics to accommodate aging baby boomers.

They include:

Bobby Darin --- Splish, Splash, I Was Havin' a Flash.

Herman's Hermits --- Mrs. Brown, You've Got a Lovely Walker .

Ringo Starr --- I Get By With a Little Help From Depends.

The Bee Gees -- - How Can You Mend a Broken Hip.

Roberta Flack--- The First Time Ever I Forgot Your Face.

Johnny Nash --- I Can't See Clearly Now.

Paul Simon--- Fifty Ways to Lose Your Liver

The Commodores --- Once, Twice, Three Times to the Bathroom.

Marvin Gaye --- Heard It Through the Grape Nuts.

Procol Harem--- A Whiter Shade of Hair.

Leo Sayer --- You Make Me Feel Like Napping.

The Temptations --- Papa's Got a Kidney Stone.

Abba--- Denture Queen.

Tony Orlando --- Knock 3 Times On The Ceiling If You Hear Me Fall.

Helen Reddy --- I Am Woman, Hear Me Snore.

Leslie Gore--- It's My Procedure, and I'll Cry If I Want To.

And Last but NOT least:

Willie Nelson --- On the Commode Again

Many thanks to Doug Martin for sharing these.

Well I Made It

Had to be at St. Lukes Hospital on Wednesday at high noon to prepare for the 1:30 surgery. This particular surgery was to be performed by a robot( for those of you that are interested google Da Vinci Robotic) and had been highly recommended as it is the least evasive and recovery time is cut in half. I went to sleep at 1:20 and woke up 7 1/2 hours later. Then I had to have the typical hospital night rest, every two hours someone is waking you up to take your vitals. Some rest. The next morning at 10 the doctor came in to see how I was doing and said I could go home. This was unreal, less than one day in the hospital for major surgery. I of course jumped at this chance. By the time "The Madge" got to the hospital and we were given the all post operation instructions and goodies (slippers, gauze, urinals etc etc) it was 4 PM. Things were still looking real good. The doctor had given us two prescriptions, an antibiotic and pain medicine, Madge said she would get them filled the next day. I think it was about 7:30 when the train came roaring down the tracks and hit me head on. I didn't realize that I HAD been on pain medicine and it was wearing off. Too late now to go to the drug store so let Jimmy grin and bear it. My stomach was now bloated, more than normal, and it felt as though a steel tipped boot was kicking me the entire night. Since I also have a catheter, I had to keep checking it to make sure I didn't go over the brim. This was not pleasant. The Madge did get to the drug store this morning so everything is once again mellow.

Another Cruise Under Our Belt

First things first, I finally got the movie we took of Caden in the bathtub. The little guy looks like a sea turtle trying to get back into the ocean.

The cruise was great. We were supposed to go with both the Calonico's and the Kennedy's however due to a death in Dave's family they had to cancel at the very last minute. So the Kennedy's and the Murphy's headed down to Galveston to board the "Voyager of the Seas". After being stuck in traffic, due to two accidents, we arrived in Galveston only to be stuck again in "Cruise" traffic. The access to the dock and the parking process needs a major overhaul, but once we were in the facility we had priority boarding, a glass of champagne and were on board in no time.
Hadn't even made it to the elevator when it was time for the bon voyage drink. This was our first time to travel with Kay and Joe and seeing Kay in action is a real treat. We hadn't walked the thirty five feet to the table in the cocktail lounge and she had three different conversations with total strangers. By the time the cruise was over she had been in contact with a least fifty percent of the passengers and ten percent of the crew, Some children actually ran the other way when they saw her.
The weather could have been better, at one point the wind was 40 M.P.H. and the seas had fifteen foot swells. We made it to Mexico where Kay and Madge played with the Dolphins while Joe went to the farmacia to buy prescription drugs that were sold over counter for 1/8 the price that the US gets. Do I hear the word "Illegal"?
We then headed to the Cayman Islands where the Captain announced that it was so rough and windy that he will sail to the other side on the island to see if we could get ashore at another port. The women spent about three hours on land, Joe also went ashore for thirty minutes and yours truly hung around the bar reading a novel. Now it's off to Jamaica, a place none of us cared about. Just as well because we arrived in Montego Bay at 10 in the morning and the Captain announced "Too windy and too rough to attempt docking" We then sat drifting for three hours and headed back to Galveston.
While at sea the Kennedy's celebrated their 50th wedding anniversary, their room had been decorated, the champagne had been chilled and the crew sang "Happy anniversary" and gave them a very nice cake with an inscription on it. Since Kay had told all the strangers she met, some of them twice, that they were celebrating their 50th I am surprised the ship didn't blow it's horn and have the entire crew sing. Outside of the weather we had a great time. The food was the best we have every experienced, the crew extremely polite and accommodating, and memories we made will always bring a smile to our faces. Here's a few pictures.

Too much gambling, excitement or Pinot?

Kay doesn't look impressed with this salad

But Joe sure does

The water splashing out of the pool and this pool was drained about half way.

The 50th anniversary party

Now it's time to start planning our next excursion, but before that there are a few things I must take care of. I head into the hospital this Wednesday to have a little surgery, it seems with some of the tests Madge had me do found cancer in my prostate. Well say goodbye to that gland, I am having it yanked out, besides I didn't need it to begin with. So I won't be posting for a few days but should be up and going strong by this weekend.

If You Don't Like It Wait An Hour

I am referring to the weather here in Texas. We are just five days from jumping on board the cruise ship and heading south. Today it's 79 degrees, sounds great doesn't it? Tonight it will be 38 with a high tomorrow of 43 then dipping to 31. By Saturday it will be 65. So what is one to do in preparation for a vacation? STAY INDOORS. You leave the house today in shorts and polo shirt, do some shopping, leave the mall around five and potentially freeze your tootsies off. You then catch a cold, run a 102 temp, shiver, sweat, cough, sneeze and wheeze and by Sunday (day of the cruise) you wished you were in a pine box waiting for the dirt to fall. Your house is a controlled environment therefore stay in it.
Went to the rare bookstore the other day and I bought Anne Franks' Diary, not the book but THE diary, paid a fortune for it but it IS a collectors dream and will increase in value. (see picture and click to enlarge)
A-CHOO gotta go now.

We Are Getting Close

The cruise is only one week away and I must say I have covered most of the bases. Bought new luggage and it has arrived, reserved and prepaid for parking on pier, ordered a few bottles of Pinot Grigio for "The Madge" and will be chilled and delivered to the room by the time we set sail. I have also booked some shore activities for "The Madge" on some of the islands, this will be a surprise for her. After carefully looking over the 100 plus excursions that the cruise line offers I decided to deal directly with some locals and get the unusual tours.
Tour number one in the Cayman Islands
This should be a good one for her.

If she enjoys that tour I am sure that this second one in Jamaica will really excite her.
I of course have already made arrangements for myself.

Pat's Birthday

I tried to publish this on You Tube for the whole world to see, however it seems there is a copyright infringement with Time Warner. I will work on this and WILL get around it, so stay tuned.

And You Wonder Why They Fail

About six months ago I closed an account account I had with Chase Bank, everything went smooth and the funds were transferred over to another bank/account. Last week I received a statement from Chase showing that I have a balance of $.01, I thought this can't be right and immediately called their service center. The woman on the other end of the phone was extremely polite and explained that when the account was closed the computers calculated the interest for on the balance for a partial day. OK, I can accept that but how can we make this one more piece of unneccessary mail go away. She explained that I would have to write a authorization letter or go down to the Service Center with this letter allowing me to withdraw the funds. Funds?????? "It's one penny" I explained "so why don't you keep the change". Nope, that's not possible. "So you want me to write a letter, either pay postage or drive over to the Service Center (13 miles), allowing me to withdraw one penny?" "I have a better idea, you can continue to send statements showing no interest was earned on this penny and then you will have to send me tax statements showing activity on this account, and will probably cost the bank about $150 a year". "Thank You and have a nice day".